I've been slacking on the blog a whole lot lately at least that's the way I feel. My week in was chill Saturday I went to Neka and Kris Mom's B-Day cookout and had a nice time. I invited Tausha along with me since I wasn't sure if Tiff was going to show up and Neka was with her friends and Kris was mingling with her family. I didn't want to be chillin alone now I'm not a needy person and can meet folks on my own but in this case this time I didn't want to be alone.

I called Tiffany and after getting her voice mail I called Tausha who said yeah sure she would come chill with me. Tiffany called me right back and said she was coming too.

The food was wonderful, the music was nice and the drinks were mellow I had a real nice time I got to talk with Tanya and Kori who are friends with Kris but cool people I think Kori is so pretty and she's older then me she looks good for her age for real. Could be all the sleep she gets at nite (lol) I danced and just had a all around good time and can't wait until next year.

When I left there I went to get my ride from Kris's house and then was on my way to pick James up from Addison road. I thought I was going to be on my way to the party Tony was DJ-ing. But needless to say ....long story short Tony never answered my phone calls, Donyale ended up being at the party, Tony came home at 7 am Sunday morning, said he lost his phone...........yeah he found it when he went back to the house where the party was to get his equipment ..just like I knew he would. I didn't even trip off the fact that she was there and he came home the next day at 7AM ..........JEDIIIIIIIIII

Monday Ruby paid me a visit I was happy to see her so her ass will be gone when I get to camp (LOL)

work was chill as it has been all this week so far today is my Friday (SMILE)

I've been thinking a lot about my life and stuff and have decided that 10 years is all I have left in this marriage . I have to start saving money, changing the way I depend on Tony, get a second job I love to do, and just prepare myself mentally for this big change. If for some reason things change and I know I can be truly happy in the marriage still then I will stay but I don't fore see that happening maybe the time apart will do us good. Smitty is back to see his ex wife again it's funny their creeping (he got married again remember). I just ............I'm just not happy and I know I can be.

Tiffany had me laughing when she asked me about a new crush and I told her there wasn't any she brought up Meesha and that is not a crush I just think she's cute as well as another chick. But as far as crushes go that is over for me believe that I'm not saying I won't stop......you know but that's just what it will be.

I went to Mary's right after work to get my hair braided (cornrows) I hate my BIG ass forhead but it was cheep and I needed it done for camp.

When I got home Tony and I watched TV and ate Chicken Nuggets together.

Shay baby sat KiKi's baby boy and the twins while they took the other kids to Kings Dominion. Jamie paid her $80 she was siced.

This morning was pretty busy I haven't heard from the DCL crew this morning they must be busy knowing Meesha she might be off today getting ready for camp. I should have too off today as well and NOT to get ready for camp (wink) oh yeah and NOT TO BE WITH MEESHA!!!!!

Tausha called me this morning she has really been there for me between her and Mia I haven't leaned on their shoulder so much in years but since I'm not totally involved with them and they are on the outside looking in I can really express my feelings with out ..............with out any strange looks. I should be over this by know, I should be pushing on, I should be ......................so many other things but I'm not........this is hard and .............yeah this is hard harder then the 1st ........................

Tausha and Duke are over ..................he's been carrying her and I finally had to give it to her straight no chaser. You know I hate doing that since I've been told I may be the reason my friends aren't married. But I had to tell her about her behavior. Once again I don't have the answers (Look at my shyt) but .......yeah I be having my Vivica thang on point. (smile)